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Tips I may be bullshitting you

Not to be out done by the charlatans of the world, I have my own bag of tricks that are sure fire signs that I'm bullshitting you. Here's ones to look for:

  • I'm wearing a tie. A tie is like a mask that hides deceit behind faux professionalism. I've developed a mistrust of ties, and in particular, never trust myself in a tie.
  • I start a story with "During my travels through". I probably haven't travelled through that location and it probably has nothing to do with what I'm about to say, but it does give it an air of authority!
  • I have a microphone. There's something about the giddy power of voice amplification that lends itself to telling porkies.
  • I say "I give up". I actually mean you should give up because I'm going to wait until no one is looking and then work single-mindedly to win.

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